The mass quantity of weddings I’ve attended this summer has made me painfully aware of my singleness.  And not simply because I just want to be in a relationship, or I’m feeling lonely.  (Although oftentimes if I’m honest with myself, I’m seeking a man to be some sort of Savior. Why do I do that? I already have a perfect Savior!) But most of all, I desire a relationship that glorifies God. 

Marriage is an earthly symbol of Christ’s marriage to his people, to the church.  God created the institute of marriage so that we could understand how devoted Christ is to His bride…to us.  Since men and women were both made in the image of God, their union completes his vision for a partnership that can work together to glorify Him in this world. 

That being said, there is only so much I can do on my own.  Yes, God has a calling and a purpose for me in my singleness, but I also know He will have a purpose for me in a relationship that is pursuing Him.  I desire to see that completed, but I also recognize His time is more perfect than mine.

I detest being one of those girls that has a list of what they desire in a husband. But I’d like to think mine is short and sweet. I desire a man that loves God more than He loves me.  I want him to pursue God above anything else.  Relationships are meant to glorify God, and if you don’t do that on your own, you won’t do it while you are dating me.  God is my Lord, and He better be yours too. 

The past few days, I’ve gotten the opportunity to catch up with an old friend.  My conversations with him filled me with hope.  I’ve often lamented about the lack of godly men.  He is an incredible person with a passion for his Lord.  He puts God’s calling above his own happiness, and recognizes that God has big things to do through Him, he just has to be patient in His timing.  That is the type of man I desire to marry.

But that being said, am I worthy of such a man? Am I the type of woman that puts Christ first in her life? If I answer honestly, I’m not.  But I have confidence that God is molding me to be ready when my future husband is ready.  I can see that God has a plan for me in a relationship, but for now, I’ll serve Him in my singleness- because that’s His plan for me, and His plan is infinitely better than mine!

First off, let me preface this blog with these words: I'm ok.

So last night, I was heading home from Newport News back to my parents house in Chesapeake.  I left around 7:15, called my mom and told her I'd be home in 30 minutes.  Then I saw the backup at the tunnel.  I called her back and told her not to expect me till later.

So, I"m stuck in traffic, I merge into the one lane they've got us down to, and enter the tunnel.  We pass the road work on the right side. I'm going about 25 mph and the guy in front of me is obnoxiously  riding his brakes.  At least that gave me a clue that people were constantly braking.  So we get to this point where we are accelerating. 

Needless to say, I'm excited.  So I look down and check my speedometer. Woot! 45 mph!

Then I looked up.

And saw the red lights.

I slammed on my brakes, but I knew it was too late. 

I slammed in back of the SUV that had so nicely been riding his brakes for me earlier.  Apparently he slammed on his brakes because of the people in front of him did the same.

My adorable little Civic is no match for an SUV.

My brand new, not even 3 month old Civic.

There was NO damage to his car whatsoever.  My car, however, suffered a half torn off bumper, dent in the center of the hood that caused the hood to bow on the sides, and lights that got jammed up 2 inches. 

Sigh.

I called my insurance this morning, filed a claim, and so I only have to pay a $500 deductible.  They will cover the rest.  So now I have to wait for the parts to get in once I take it to the collision center tomorrow.  It could be a few weeks before it is fixed, and I don't have rental car provisions on my policy.

Other than a backache and some whiplash, there is nothing wrong with me.  I'm very blessed that nothing else happened.

God is good, and He is mighty to save. 

Psalm 25: 20.....
       Guard my life and rescue me;
       let me not be put to shame,
       for I take refuge in You.

So you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again.
The sun is the same in a relative way but you're older,
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death.

                Time

Home, home again.
I like to be here when I can.

                Breathe (reprise)

And if the band you're in starts playing different tunes
I'll see you on the dark side of the moon.

                Brain Damage

Welcome my son, welcome to the machine.
What did you dream?
It's alright we told you what to dream.

                Welcome to the Machine

How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl,
Year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found?
The same old fears.
Wish you were here.

                Wish You Were Here

Night after night, we pretend its all right
But I have grown older and
You have grown colder and
Nothing is very much fun any more.

                One of My Turns

Hey you, don't tell me there's no hope at all
Together we stand, divided we fall.

                Hey You

When I was a child
I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye.
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my finger on it now
The child is grown,
The dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb.

                Comfortably Numb

I have to know.
Have I been guilty all this time?

                Stop

And I'll never pine
For the sad days and the bad days
When we was workin' from nine to five.

                Biding My Time

Do you remember me? How we used to be?
Do you think we should be closer?          

                Your Possible Pasts

Stay and help me to end the day.
And if you don't mind,
We'll break a bottle of wine.
Stick around and maybe we'll put one down,
Because I wanna find what lies behind those eyes.

                Stay

Would you like to say something before you leave
Perhaps you'd care to state exactly how you feel
We said good-bye before we said hello
I hardly even like you, I shouldn't care at all

                Summer 68

Witness the man who raves at the wall
Making the shape of his questions to Heaven.
Whether the sun will fall in the evening
Will he remember the lesson of giving?
Set the controls for the heart of the sun.

                Set the Controls for the Heart of the Sun

And I don't care if I'm nervous with you
I'll do my loving in the winter.

                Jugband Blues